Stupidity Tax

Stupidity - If your dumb enough, we'll bill you for it

Following on from a previous post ‘7 Tips for Delivering a Perfect Rant‘, my all time favourite Absolutely Fabulous epidode is when Eddy goes off-on-one in court and rants about Stupidity Tax.

Pretty funny right? In actual fact though, we pay Stupidity Tax every day.

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former.
Albert Einstein

Here are 10 examples of how we pay for our stupidity:

1 ) Link machines – you take the kids bowling but forgot to draw out cash from a proper bank beforehand. So now you’re forced to use the link machine that charges you £1.50 to withdraw your own money.

2 ) Parking tickets – great big double yellow lines say NO. You thought you’d be clever and stick it to the man (and besides you only needed to buy a pint of milk) so you park, look shiftily around and leg it into the corner shop. When you come out you’re surprised & appaulled that you have a ticket on your windscreen. Surprised? Really?

3 ) Late credit card payments – you know what day the bill is due and you know they’ll tax you if the payment’s late. On the other hand, they’re in the right business - they earn more when people don’t pay.

4 ) Getting pregnant by accident – hmmm, another kid. One you didn’t budget for. Do you know how much those things cost? Not so clever unless you can find a way to make it pay for itself & quick. “Darling, how would you like to be a beauty queen?”

5 ) Novelty gifts – yes the robot dog was very cool. And the remote control speed boat. Drum kit. Talking brain thing. It didn’t take long for the novelty to wear off though huh? Fun depreciates. Even eBay can’t help you with that.

6 ) Fast food – it’s not actually chicken so what did you just pay for?

7 ) Hotel mini bars – when you’re too lazy or drunk to go to a proper shop.

8 ) Late night shopping on QVC – also known as boredom tax or you-should-have-gone-to-bed-after-that-last-glass-of-wine tax. Do you really think that just 5 minutes a day on the Ab-Shaper got him that bad boy six pack?

9 ) The gym that you never go to – yup once you realise that the Ab-Shaper isn’t the miracle worker you was hoping for, you sign up for 12 months at the local gym. And go twice.

10 ) Silly iPhone apps. Sure ‘Rate a Fart 2.0′ was only £0.59p and amused you and your geek friends over pizza and beer, but all those .59p’s add up you know.

Can you think of any more add to the list?

Dee Uzoka says:

November 13, 2009 at 7:28 pm

Oh Gina, this made me laugh out loud, literally! Very funny but true observations. We’ve all been guilty of them at some point. I won’t say which ones I’ve paid :p

Gina Romero says:

November 15, 2009 at 1:47 pm

I’m glad you enjoyed the post Dee! And ha ha yes all but 2 of these are actual things I have done I won’t own up to which ones either lol. Feel free to add any others you can think of…